My Excitement and Fears of Motherhood

excitement and fears of motherhood

It’s getting close.  Soon this little being growing in my belly will be ready to make his debut.  I have about 5 months left of this pregnancy and then I will get to meet my little baby boy.

I am getting more and more excited with each passing day.  The little movements I feel, the changes I see in the mirror (though scary, they are so thrilling!), all of it has been quite a ride.

I have to be honest though, I haven’t been a fan of pregnancy.  It’s been rough these past weeks!  I’m sick almost every day, I’m exhausted constantly, I’m struggling with accepting my changing body, and I had a lot of issues at the beginning that made it more scary than exciting.  

Now that I’m further along, the complications are less but the fear and anxiety is still there.  Here’s what I have running through my mind every. single. day.

Will I be a good mother?  

Will J and I be able to parent and communicate as one?

Will I be enough?

Can I do it all?  Motherhood, Wife, Career-woman, student

Can I control my anger when I’m tired and frustrated?

Will J still look at me like he did when we first met?

Will I be happy with my body even after childbirth?

Then the excitement kicks in and slowly takes away some of my fears of motherhood.

I will love this child more than life itself.

I will show them God’s love.

I will share the world, just as my parents did with me.

I will instill confidence and self-love.

I will not be afraid to ask for help.

I will put their needs, wants and desires above mine.

I will focus on them and give them my attention.

I just have to survive the final weeks before I get to meet this beautiful child.  

 

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